There was something special about 100-101. i don't know exactly what it was but there was "something". i don't know how magic works or destiny for that matter but you were just as much a part of it as i was. It could never have been the same without you being there. I mean that!
What happened later? You know i have been mulling over that question for a couple of days now. I think the simple answer is that i just got worn down over the years and was drained. The veneer of Dr Jekell was slowly eroded as my psychic energy got drained to reveal aspects of Mr Hyde, or as Jung described it "the shadow". We all have Mr Hyde in us and thank god most people manage to contain him. Think of the example of some young mother exhausted from dealing with her children and one day just snaps and beats one of them but feeling guilt and shame afterwards. I just reached a semi permanent state like that in the last few years there. I estimate that in the 8 years i was there i was away on holiday for less than 50 days. Whose fault was that? Well mine of course and probably if John and Iris hadn’t cajoled me to take a break, i probably wouldn't even taken 50 days away on account of loving that place so much. Interacting with dozens and dozens of people every week slowly takes its toll. I am not talking about all the great people who passed through that place,which was probably the majority,some of whom were pure gems as we both know. There were however just enough psychic energy vampire assholes slowly draining my batteries. At the end of each summer i even noticed my breathing pattern had changed and was taking shorter sharper breaths. I am surprised i didn't end up having a heart attack. Of course the drinking didn't help either. Being permanently semi hung over only added fuel to the fire. Your situation was different in a way on account that you had long periods away and of course your personality is a lot calmer than mine in the first place..so.
However dont tell me that you haven't been tired and under pressure sometimes in your life and lashed out at people when normally you wouldn't have? Never!? Well, everyone has and a small percentage of the prison population ended up there because of that. Yes i did behave badly towards you my friend at times and i doubt i ever really apologised. Well, i apologise now. I am sorry that i ever hurt you. You are certainly one of the best people i have known in my life and only wish i had half of your good qualities and talents. That's the truth. At the end of the day maybe the universal force of entropy took hold and disintegrated everything. That happens. I could talk for an hour on "what happened " and it probably still wouldnt be enough.